To Everything There Is a Season

Today I want to share a bit about the struggles and joys in my personal life.

Welcome to the world!

Nearly three weeks ago, we welcomed our new grandson into the world. There is nothing in life that compares to the advent of a newborn baby. All red and wiggly, ten fingers, ten toes, the cutest rosebud mouth, a head full of hair and lungs that can wake a parent from the deepest sleep. He is our daughter’s first child—this is the daughter who swore she would never give birth but would adopt instead.

Love changes hearts and minds like nothing else can. She married a wonderful guy who truly loves and adores her. He takes care of her in ways that express true love. I am so thankful they see themselves as equal partners in the marriage as well as in raising children.

Each week, my husband and I spend an afternoon showering our newest grandchild with love and attention. Listening to his precious baby coos and squeaks, talking to him and simply watching him sleep – what a blessing life is!

Saying goodbye

Last week, my mother was admitted into hospice care. She is 83 years young and has struggled with congestive heart failure for the past nine months. Since that time, she has been on oxygen 24/7 with limited energy and frequent discomfort.

For three of the last nine months her body was fighting shingles. Think of hundreds of needles constantly poking and shocking your ribs, neck, face and arms.

Mom is a fighter and fiercely independent. A massive heart attack took my dad’s life at the young age of 52. For the past 31 years,  Mom has lived independently in her own place, doing what she enjoyed and calling all the shots.

She bakes cookies for the neighborhood kids, fixes meals for those who are ill in her church and enjoys gardening. Restricted mobility and accepting care from others is a tremendous challenge for her.

The thought of accepting hospice care is even more difficult.

That is, it was until she began to see firsthand what hospice care is really about.

The truth about hospice care

Many people think hospice care is about dying.

The truth is, hospice is more about living.

It is about staying in your own home, surrounded by comforting memories, familiar places and people who love you. No one wakes you at all hours of the day and night to gather information, blood or other vital information. No machines blinking. No tubes or monitors strapped to various parts.

Just the peaceful intimate surroundings of home.

If she is in pain, they can alleviate it. When she needs the fluid pumped from her lungs, they are there. No emergency room visit or hospital stay.  If she wants to sit outside basking in the sun, she can.

Family can come and go on her schedule.

A nurse comes by regularly to check on her, relieving family members of medical responsibility.

Her doctor said there was nothing more she could do for her. I am grateful that she recommended hospice care. I do not want to see my mom spend her last days suffering in pain.

Hospice professionals are a godsend to families and patients. They offer the family peace of mind and the patient an opportunity to leave this life with dignity.

A season for everything

To paraphrase Solomon’s words in Ecclesiastes, “There is a season for everything. A time for every delight, event or purpose under heaven—a time to be born and a time to die… a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance.”

When a child is born, we are filled with joy and laughter. We look forward with great anticipation wondering what he will become as we watch him grow.

Yet when a loved one leaves this world, we are prone to weeping and sadness.

It’s all good

Why not celebrate a life well-lived? Why not reflect on the joys experienced and the love shared?  Should we not consider what someone brought to the world and to the people around them. We should celebrate their legacy!

Death is as much a part of life as birth yet we are unwilling or unprepared to accept it.

Once my days on earth are over, I hope my children, grandchildren, all my family and friends sit around the room laughing and talking about the crazy things I did or thought about doing, the awesome memories made on hiking trails, rivers and road trips. The fact that I often burned at least one dish at every family gathering. I hope to leave a legacy of laughter, joy and positive energy. May my friends and family laugh so hard they cry!

Celebrate!

Let’s celebrate the days we are given with gratitude and thankfulness. Let’s make memories that will be shared with laughter and warmth. Let’s be grateful for each breath, each step, each sight and each sound. Remember to thank the people in your life and let them know what it is you genuinely appreciate about them.

And when you lose a loved one, think of it not as a loss but as happy memory of a life lived well. Take care to focus on the present, to appreciate the people in your life. Take time to show them your love, to tell them how grateful you are for their presence in your life.

Living the grateful life is living a life with no regrets.

Tomorrow I leave to spend time with my mom, celebrating life!

Today, I’m spending the afternoon watching my grandson grow.

What a blessing life is!

Thank you for allowing me to share the personal side of my life. If you have a loved one who might benefit from hospice care, please contact your local hospice. They will be happy to answer your questions and provide you with information on the resources they can provide. May God bless you, your family and friends.

In our next post we will return with 5 More Innovative Ways to Say Thank You.